You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
