I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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