you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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