forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
