her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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