He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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