I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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