Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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