whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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