That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
