I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
