Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
