Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
