is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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