under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
