Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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