We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
