when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Can Purell be used as lube?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
