I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
