I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
