Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize