awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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