I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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