Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
