If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize