I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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