There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
After tacos, we're chasing women.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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