Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
