Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
