'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
