...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Randomize
