Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
