I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
