I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
