if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
operation harelip BJ is a go
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
A+ Viking dick
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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