Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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