it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
