the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
