You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
