And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
