i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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