No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
