I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
