all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
