Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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