So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
