i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
