we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
