For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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