drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
